2nd Counselor in Primary

January 31st , 2011
Yesterday at church I was sustained and set apart as the 2nd counselor in the Primary Presidency. I was asked just a week ago if I would accept this call. I felt privileged to be given such a calling. At the same time I had no idea what that calling would entail, how difficult it would be for me, or even what the order/schedule of Primary was.

The President is Amy Neihbur. She and her family moved here about a year ago. She and her husband have two children...both adopted. Cade, their youngest, was born the exact same day Lachoneus was. The two boys love each other.

Rachel Wynn is the 1st counselor in the Primary right now. She has two children, a daughter who is 3yrs old and a son who is 2. Cardon, the 2 year old, is not close to Luke even though they are both in nursery together.

Sterling and I have had many families from our ward over for a meal. We like to invite a family now and then to join us in our home. It is fun!
But the Wynn's we have never had over yet. We will soon...brother Wynn is deploying in March. Sterling was also going to deploy in March but just a week or two ago we learned he is no longer going. They want someone with three stripes more than Sterling has to go do the job Sterling was told (originally) that he would. It was going to be Sterling's first deployment. He was happy to finally experience deploying but sad at the thought of leaving with wife and children for six whole months. Now that he is not going I don't have to worry about the struggle it would have been for me to be without my love, my best friend, for that long.
I would probably have been fine being mother of two by myself for 6months. I probably would have been fine doing the finances. But being away from my husband would truly be a trial.

I am so excited Sterling will not be missing the big milestones Tiberias will hit this year...crawling and walking.

Back to the original topic though...my new calling.

The previous 2nd counselor (sis Vanessa Hatcher) did a fabulous job at her calling! She even took on pretty much all the Secretary's responsibilities as well...because there is no secretary.
So now I have huge shoes to fill. And being great with kids and having many talents I know I am expected by the presidency and the bishop to be great at this calling.

I still have my Ward Historian calling but that doesn't require my time every week. That is basically me keeping an eye out for big events etc in our ward and the lives of those in it. When things do happen I take pictures if possible and record the facts and maybe a few fun tidbits as well.

I met with Vanessa Hatcher this morning in her home. She gave me a binder of 2nd counselor and secretary responsibilities. She showed me how she did things, most all were on the computer. So a lot of what I do will be on the computer...making lists and a newsletter and emailing such things to the right people. Then on Sundays, as I learned at church yesterday, I am in the Primary room for the 2nd and 3rd hour of church. We have the jr primary (the youngest half of primary) and we do opening exercises, music time, a child gives a talk and a child reads a scripture, prayer and announcements. Then those kids go to class while the older half come from class to primary where we do the same thing over again.

I will be required to do Sharing Time now and then, conduct once in a while but mostly keep the kids reverent during Primary. I make sure the kids have teachers each week. If their teacher cancels or just fails to appear then I find someone to teach...I do it myself if I have to.

Sterling will take care of Tiberias the first hour of Primary. But the 2nd hour he goes to fulfill his own calling in young men's. Having the baby in Primary is a distraction for the children...especially the older children. They want to play with and hold the baby. Plus, if I am holding the baby it is hard for me to get the children to quiet down. And Tiberias is teething so yesterday was in the back, holding Ty, trying to keep him quiet the whole time.

I could easily find people to hold Tiberias in Relief Society that last hour of church. But I don't want to be without my baby. Two hours without him (except for feeding and diaper changes) is not easy. Knowing he's with someone else...that's hard.
And yesterday Luke cried all through Nursery. With the church time change from 9:30a last year to 1p this year Luke has not adjusted yet. He napped before church yesterday but we can't always get him to take an early nap. He was unhappy all day yesterday...either sick or just growing. Either way we decided, the nursery teacher along with Ster and I, to bring Luke's beloved blanky to nursery each week. We did that once or twice already this year and it kept him calm. So days when he ends up tired or having growing pains his blanky should help. That means I have to remember to wash it every Saturday.

Talking to Vanessa this morning made me feel I could become overwhelmed at all this. But I am trying not to let that happen and am hoping that all these responsibilities individually are simple...that once I start doing them all I will not struggle.

My first task is to hurry and get the February newsletter made and emailed out because tomorrow is February. The newsletter technically is the secretary's job but Amy asked if I would do it and I am happy to. Once I get going in this calling I will see what secretary responsibilities I might want Rachel or Amy to do. I cannot yet tell what will be too much for me...if I could do it all myself.

I know I can do this. It is a big job. But I worked two full time jobs and even tried a part time job for a week when I was single and living in Spanish Fork. I had no time for a social life but that's not the point. The point is that I was able to do that and keep my sanity and my health. So I think I can be a mother of two and fulfill all three of my church callings (Visiting Teaching being the third calling).

And one big thing I've noticed since moving into this ward is how much the Bishopric pushes "family first." They tell us to fulfill our callings for church but to not let them interfere with our families. Our husbands and children come first. I wonder if they are pushing that notion all over the world now...if the Prophet and his Presidency have sent out letters informing all steak and ward leaders that this is #1 priority. To make sure all church members know that family comes first.
I love that.
Sterling and I do our best to make our family as happy and strong as possible. We focus on our marriage first and our children second. Well, technically we focus on our sanity second :D

We are still in "the Honeymoon phase." We've been married three and a half years and are more in love than we have ever been. Our marriage is stronger than it has ever been.
When we got married I believed that the honeymoon phase ends in all marriages and that often (many years into the marriage) individuals fall out of love. One will still be in love while the other is not. But that they fall back into love eventually. Marriage takes work. It's not easy.
But now I believe, as does my husband, that maybe the Honeymoon phase does not have to end. It seems we can be in this phase the rest of our lives...if we continue to ever to work at it. We take time to be together, without the kids. Whether it's a date (which is expensive...to go out and do something while paying for a sitter) or doing something with worth when the kids are asleep.
We went on a date Saturday night. We got Burger King and saw the latest Harry Potter movie in the theater. We had a lot of fun! But we didn't get a lot of time to talk to each other. So last night Sterling told me his plan "After the kids go to bed I'll light some candles in the bedroom, turn out the light and we just lay in bed and talk." And that's what we did. Well, Sterling's brother Jon called and they talked a long time and then we finished watching a movie before we went upstairs. So by that time we got to our quality time together I was sleepy. But we took a few minutes, by candle light, to just talk and enjoy being together.

Since we are truly happy, our marriage is practically perfect, we then focus on our children. Naturally, I can't let the baby cry so I can spend time with my husband. I take care of the kids as they need it.

I do what I can to make Luke and Ty happy and keep their sanity (which often requires getting outdoors into the fresh air). I try to make real quality time with Luke at least once while Sterling is at work. Sterling takes some quality time with Luke and Tiberias when he is home.
I love watching all three boys together. Their father is so different with them than I am!
I love to watch Sterling wrestle with Luke. I love watching his read to the boys with one child on each leg. I love seeing Lachoneus and Ty play together with Sterling's help. This morning Sterling had both kids and they were sitting on the floor. Tiberias kept grabbing at luke's toys and clothes and leaning in toward him. Luke thought it was funny...like he was playing with his brother. Then Sterling helped the baby attack Luke (wrestle him) and Luke loved it. Luke is very good at being gentle with Ty. Even though Tiberias was wrestling Luke he was careful not to grab back at the baby or accidentally kick him. It's such a joy to see! These moments are so precious!

Tiberias is a few weeks away from turning 6months old. He is still too young to play much with Luke. But I can see Luke finding a friend in Ty already. Someone to kind of play with. Someone to share the toys, parents love and home with. Luke loves not being the only child.