Adjusting

On Wednesday Sterling and I left the boys with my parents and we went to Vegas for one night...before Sterling left for military cross-training.
It was so fun! We are so in love and we are best friends. We have so much fun together.
We walked part of The Strip Wednesday night when it was dark and the lights were all lit. Shopped at M&M's world...got stuff for all of us. So fun! Saw the Belaggio water show.
Thursday morning we had breakfast together at the hotel's buffet. Then I dropped Sterling off at the airport. It's not incredibly difficult to say goodbye.
So far he's not ever been gone more than two months. And this four month one will hopefully be split in half with a visit from or to Sterling. We'll hopefully get a weekend with him.
It will get harder to be apart...as time goes on.
But Sterling has it harder than we do. The boys and I are staying with family...lots of people to socialize with, live with and enjoy. Happy and familiar. Plus, I have a ton to do between taking care of the boys, homeschooling, helping my mom (with her sewing classes she teaches and with cleaning, cooking and organizing around the house), my hobbies and enjoying time away from the boys once in a while...because I have babysitters around all the time.
Sterling is in a new place with nobody he knows, no kids to take care of and no oven and stove to cook with. I don't know how much shooting he will get to do there, if any. I know he's on the beach so there's swimming and possibly fishing. No hunting.  What else does he like to do? Woodwork. He likes reading and learning but he'll be doing a lot of that for school so I don't know if he'll want to do it during his leisure time as well.
He likes movies and tv as I do.

The little boys...so far they are doing really well about daddy being gone. They do say they miss him. They have talked to him once on the phone.

The first day without Sterling I felt two things 1) Overwhelmed by how much I had put off to do while Ster is away. I had a ton to do to prepare for school which was just a few days away.
2) Strange that Sterling was so far away and would not be with me for months.

When Sterling is gone for an extended period it can be like I am a single mother. I choose our schedules and base nothing around Sterling or his schedule. I discipline the children alone.
I do have the emotional support and the love of a man...that singles mother's don't often have.

Right before Sterling left Ty started wanting us to lay with him to go to sleep. I have done well to avoid this since Luke was a baby. I don't want to have to lay with my children to get them to sleep. I want them to self sooth and fall asleep on their own.
But...Sterling started laying with Ty. Now it's a problem. Right now Ty has been in his bedroom refusing to sleep for maybe 40 minutes. I refuse to lay with him. He has gotten up saying he needs to go to the bathroom, four times. He has gotten up to tell me he wants the music turned off. Gotten up to get spankings four times. And it crying and screaming "Mommy!" He has tried "I am not taking a nap" and "I am going downstairs." I keep putting him back to bed and leaving the room.

I don't know what to do. Luke was 1 1/2 yrs old when he did this...when he moved from his crib to a bed. He would need a nap so badly but would not stay in bed. It is horrible..no fun. Now I know Ty has done this before...when he moved to a real bed, I believe. But now, at three years old, he is doing it again. He needs a nap! But he is being difficult. And I don't know if I should lay with him for five to ten minutes, as I have done at bedtime at night the last few nights, or refuse to lay with him. It's going to be a fight every time if I don't lay with him. So far laying with him just a few minutes then saying "no, you just have to go to bed" has worked.

Today is Sunday. Sterling left of Thursday morning. We have been text messaging a lot...such a wonderful blessing. We have talked on the phone once a day also.

Sterling is a romantic. He tells me sweet things when we're apart. When we're together he tells me of the things he appreciates like a clean house and yummy meals and taking care of the kids. He tells me how much he loves me and what he loves about me. So it's no surprise that when he's away he says sweet things to me. I say more sweet things to him when he is away. He's not with me for me to show him my love so I put in more effort to vocally let him know my love.

Yesterday he sent his first sweet message. He texted that he will be staying in Mississippi a while but where I am will always be "home" for him. And of course I feel that same way. Although, being at my parents' house almost feels like home...the closest thing I can get to home without Sterling and without a house of my own.

On Wednseday Sterling flew like four or five hours to New Orleans. There he stayed one night and picked up our blue car we had shipped there. That process was more difficult than it should have been. The dealership refused to be helpful so he had to take the car somewhere else to be helped with whatever it was he was trying to do.
He thought it would be fun to be in New Orleans for a night. But it turned out to be expensive and not a place for him. Parking was $28 a night and dinner was $50 at the restaurant he went to. He learned it was a party city and really had nothing for him to do. It had some historical stuff but Sterling did not enjoy his stay.

From there Sterling drove an hour and a half to where he is staying in Mississippi. He got settled onto the base, into his base hotel, and did grocery shopping.
Sunday morning he went for a walk on the beach. He met a fisherman and talked with him a while. Then he got dressed for church and went and found the church.

I went to my parents' ward. I gave my name and phone number to a family who has a down syndrome toddler boy. The mother has a medical condition that leaves her in pain all the time. She has a nanny but for some reason needs a babysitter every Wednesday during the school year. I decided that's something I can do to help while I am here.
I also learned when Choir is. 4:15pm Sundays. I want to attend. I also want to perform a musical number in sacrament, for my family to hear. So I need to find out if the bishop allows spiritual LDS musical numbers to be performed that are not "hymns." I really hope so.

Lachoneus has been really destructive lately. Breaking everything. He even broke my parents walkway lights, three of them. So he has to work for my mom to earn money to pay off the lights. I don't know what to do with him.

His stutter is still doing well. In Italy his stutter was so horrible. It's the one thing I worry about when it comes to him starting Kindergarten in January. But in Utah and in Idaho when he visited Jon and his family, he barely stuttered at all. He started to do it more when he started getting comfortable and use to the Roundy's home. But then he came to Logandale and his stutter was gone again. He did stutter yesterday one time. I am glad his stutter is better! I hope it stays that way!!!

Ty and Luke both have better health since we came back to America. Ty's tummy aches he use to get atleast every other day rarely happen now. Luke's allergies have gotten so much better. It seems his problems with breathing and coughing were either from 1)the mold in our house in Italy or 2)Italy/plants etc.